The Smurfs Movie (My Version)
by Angel the Brat
Summary: Basically my version of the Smurfs movie (Read the title). Rated for language thanks to Sassette.
1. Chapter 1

_**I own absolutly nothing**_

 _ **P.S. Somethings are a little more modern than the actual time, especially the clothing.**_

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It was a beautiful day in a peaceful forest where 4 smurflings were racing on 2 storks who carried a tanned sack each, filled wwith Smurf berries.

"Come on Snappy we have to beat them!" The only girl exclaimed to her racing companion; a slightly muscled boy with tanned blue skin, round dark blue eyes, messy dirty blonde slightly covered with a white smurf hat, wearing a yellow t-shirt with a grey storm cloud and lightning bolt paired with a pair of loose white cargo shorts and yellow and white sneakers.

"Chill Sassette! We can beat them! Now hold on tight!" The boy now known as Snappy told the girl with femalish muscles and pale sapphire blue skin with light freckles sprinkled on her small nose and cheeks, small roundish violet eyes, long darkish red hair in a single braid with a smurf hat, carnation pink tank top dress that stopped just before her knees, darkish blue jean cargo vest, black sneaker heels with pink laces and blue bottoms with thick 1 inch heels, small hoop earrings (the kind that aren't dangerous) with blue and pink jewels and pink and blue choker.

The 2 they were referring to were Natural (Nat for short) who had little to no muscle, really tanned blue skin, big forest green eyes, shaggy chestnut brown hair slightly covered in a tan straw bumpkin hat, wearing a mint green t-shirt paired with brown one strapped overalls and no shoes. The other was Slouchy who has no muscle whatsoever, slightly tanned blue skin, extreamly messy (by that I mean it looks like it never met a brush) dark brown hair, lazy round brown eyes, red t-shirt, loose white jeans and white sneakers.

Back to the actual story.

Anyway Sassette complied and tightly wrapped her arms around the boy in front of her and slightly pressed her face on to his back making the smurfling to deeply blush. Fortunately he was able to focus on the task at hand and in 1 fluid motion made their stork go higher and faster. A motion Nat quickly followed.

After 10 minutes of racing Snappy and Sassette's stork went through the invisibility shield and dumped their berries out first making them the winners. Both storks landed side by side, the boys getting off first before Snappy helped the youngest and the only girl of his friends off their stork.

The small girl stretched and yawned a bit before suggesting to walk around a bit until the actual festival for the blue moon started which her friends agreed.

As they were walking they noticed that Grouchy, Gutsy and Clumsy seemed to be arguing. Wanting to know what was going on the 4 walked over to them.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" Slouchy asked. "It's nothing kids. Clumsy is just not allowed in the rehearsal is all." Grouchy told them with a little brushing motion.

Sassette ignored him and continued on.

"Why isn't he allowed?" She quizzed rocking on her feet.

"Because he brings his clutzyness everywhere and we can't have him ruining the festival. Does that answer your question lass?" Gutsy told.

"Clearly you 2 lack the verbal skills required to explain this perdicament succincly." Said an abnoxious voice that belonged to Brainy Smurf.

"Hey!" Gutsy cried as Brainy snatched the list from him.

Brainy ignored this and continued his lecture.

"Great, here we go again." Sassette mumbled with a bored look.

"You see Clumsy, the other smurfs don't want to dance with you for fear of what are politely called _'fractures'._ "

The smurflings frowned.

"Aw, how could anybody think that?" the blue klutz asked throwing his arms back which Sassette and Nat swiftly avoided. Grouchy and Gutsy weren't so lucky.

"Ow! What the smurf Clumsy!?" Grouchy exclaimed.

"Oh, sorry!" Clumsy apoligized softly as he walked away.

"That's gunna leave a big blue bruise," Brainy chuckled walking by Gutsy and Grouchy without problem.

When he passed Sassette was a different story, as she kicked him from behind causing him to fly into the rehearsing Smurfs.

The boys gaped as the young girl ran after the older male Smurf with hopes to help. He friends ran after her.

(Scene Changes to Gargamel)

Gargamel was playing with his doll- i mean marionettes.

(Don't really care about this part so I'll hurry it up.

"I have a magical map that shows me where the Smurf village is" he told to the Smurfette doll.

He then brought out his wand and cast a spell that blasted him and Azreal into the wall and then another that blasted off his roof.

"Ouch"

(Back to the smurfs)

Papa was in his lab doing a spell to make a vision.

It was the complete opposite of what he hoped.

He saw with horror as the vision Smurflings, Clumsy, Smurfette, Gutsy, Grouchy and Brainy being sucked into some sort of vortex calling out to him. The next image showed Clumsy trying to catch a wand that looked like a dragon. the next showed the mentioned Smurfs in tears calling to him from cages. Finally the last scene Snappy cradling a limp Sassette who looked as if she was sleeping, while crying and screaming for her to wake up.

Clumsy walked in and the wind blew away the vision.

"Clumsy?" Papa exclaimed trying to calm down, "w-what're you smurfing here? Shouldn't you be at the rehearsal for the Blue Moon Festival?"

"Yeah but a couple of guys got smacked in the face so I'm here to get some magical medical supplies for 'em and- aw Papa your smurf out of Smurf Root. I'll go pick mo-" Clumsy rushed speech was interrupted with a 'no' from Papa.

"The Smurf Root grows too close to Gargamel's lair, I'll get the Smurf Root myself later." Papa said shoving Clumsy- with medical box in hand out the door.

"Whew!"

(With the Smurflings)

Sassette was still looking for Clumsy when the boys caught up with her, coming to a sudden halt with their hands on their knees.

"Dang Sassy" Slouchy said, "you're fast- Woah!" He was grabbed by the front of his shirt by said girl who had a fire burning in her eyes.

"Only Snappy can call me Sassy and/or Sass!" She growled threatiningly before letting go of his now wrinkled shirt and stalking away angrily, leaving Nat and Snappy too help the red shirted smurfling up.

"Are you two dating or something. She treats it like a personal pet name." At this Snappy blushed and smacked both his friends upside the head.

"We are not dating and probably never will no matter how much I would like it - oops" he stated noticing his blunder. Unfortunatunatly for him the other two noticed it too.

"You have a crush on Sassette?" Snappy nodded with a massive blush covering his face, "ha! We knew it!"

At that Snappy whipped his head towards his two companions. "What?" He questioned.

"We knew you had a crush on her from the beginning. I mean come on! It was so obvious ! You always stare at her, help her whenever she needs it -practically jumping on your chances I must add- and always try to impress her."

"Name one time I tried to impress her."

"Hm, how about the stork race, the waterfall when you attempted to do a flip into the water but did a belly flop, that time you tried to get her water from the well but fell in instead, then there was- MPf!" Slouchy's mouth was covered by Snappy's hand.

"Didn't I say one?" Snappy said darkly before going after Sassette.

Nat and Slouchy were soon to follow but not without exchanging knowing glances."


	2. The escape through the portal!

I own absolutely nothing

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"I don't know why Papa was so worried. I'll show him how good of a helper I am when I get back with the Smurf root!" Clumsy said excitedly, unaware he was being watched by a pair of gold cat eyes. That is until he saw Gargamel.

"AH!" Clumsy yelled as he ran to the village with Gargamel and Azreal hot on his heels. Both owner and pet were shocked when they saw Clumsy disappear into thin air. "An invisible force field!?" Gargamel exclaimed in shock before slapping his forehead. "No wonder I couldn't find it all these years! It was invisible! But how do I know it's safe?" He pondered aloud. About thirty seconds later he decided to let his cat be the test subject so he threw him in and asked, "Azreal? Are you dead?" An angry meow was his response. He took that as a 'it's safe' call, so he walked through.

(Smurfs)

"Sassette..." "Smurfette..." The two girls glared at each other. Meanwhile Papa and the boy Smurflings watched the tension and ready to stop a fight when needed, knowing Sassette would beat the older girl into a pulp in seconds.

Basically the Smurflings and Sassette saw Papa and were talking to him about the festival and Smurfette showed up, showing off a dress, hat and shoes that she thought were completely different from her usual ones but then the two girls saw each other and started a glare off instead.

"Papa! Papa!" Everyone turned to see Clumsy running towards them. When he stopped, he pointed to a large bush and shouted, "Gargamel!" Said wizard appeared, net in hand, "holy smurfs..." he said with a wicked grin.

"Hefty, sound the alarm!" Everyone scattered as Crazy's shouts rang through the village. Through all the havoc and chaos the Smurflings ended up getting seperated from Sassette.

"Where'd she go?"

"How should I know?"

"Well we have to find her!"

CRASH!

The Smurflings stopped arguing as the girl they were going to look for had just jumped through the window of the house behind them, landed on her feet, and trapping Azreal who had tried to follow her through the window but got his head stuck in the process. "Hey guys" she turned to the trapped feline and laughed as she grabbed a whisker, "Ha ha! Stupid cat- Woah!" The cat tried to launch itself at her but Snappy pulled her away in time.

They were at the edge of the forest when they spotted Papa running from Gargamel. Sassette waited by a switch until she saw Papa out of the way and Gargamel in the trap. A small log swung at Gargamel's head but he dodged it easily, "aw, poor, little Sassette! Did your pathetic trap fail-" He was hit by a huge log that looked to be an old, thick tree.

"In your face son!" Sassette laughed, catching up with her friends and Papa. She stopped when she saw Clumsy going down a wrong way. "Clumsy!" She sped after him with the Smurflings, Papa, Brainy, Grouchy. Gutsy and a complaining Smurfette on her tail. Eventually they reached a cave where they saw Clumsy go over a cliff. "No!" They ran over and saw he had grabbed a root that was peaking out from the side of the cliff.

"Quick, make a smurf chain!" Papa ordered. Everyone did but as soon as they had grabbed Clumsy, the blue moon came out and shot a beam at the waterfall in the cave, making a portal. Everyone started to get sucked with only Papa on land. Slowly Papa started to lose his footing and grabbed on to a stick. Unfortunately on the other end was the wizard that they were running from.

"Come here smurfs..." He grinned wickedly as he slowly reeled them in. Papa looked at the portal, the to Gargamel and narrowed his eyes. "Not today Gargamel!" With that he let go of the stick and multiple screams sounded as the smurfs were sucked into the swirling vortex.

(New York)

"The fuck just happened?!" Sassette exclaimed as Snappy helped her up from where she had landed. Papa sighed at the young teen's language but let it slide, as he was too busy trying to figure out where they were. Unfortunately, Smurfette and Brainy didn't.

"How unlady like!" Smurfette cried dramatically. "Sassette, Sassette, Sassette! You should not talk like that. It is-""Shut both your nagging mouths or I'll shut 'em for ya!""Yes mam..." Sassette nodded and began climbing a rock to see if she could find something about this place that could tell about where they were.

"Holy shit!" She cried, seeing the skyscrapers , apartments and people. Everyone else gasped. "Woah..." "MEOW!" The smurfs turned and saw as Azreal flew out of the portal and landed in the water. "Fucking run!" (One guess on who said that) Everyone headed for a tiny forest, with Azreal on their heels, and started climbing a tree. "OW!" Sassette screamed as Azreal grabbed her long hair with his mouth and tried to pull her down. Sassette had other plans. "Fuck off ya dumb ass cat!" With that she kicked the cat on the face and got free, though he did get a bit of hair.

"Way to go Sassette!" Everyone looked to a nearby bench and saw Clumsy who hadn't gotten the 'climb the tree so you don't get eaten' plan. "Uh oh..." Clumsy said as he saw the cat looking at him. "Run God damn it!" Sassette screamed from the tree and thankfully Clumsy followed her advice. Unfortunately he fell and got trapped in a box while trying to escape. Oh well, at least he ain't cat food.

The remaining smurfs sweat dropped while Sassette face palmed at the fact that Clumsy was now in a box. Eventually a human man arrived and took the boxes into a taxi, shooing Azreal off before getting in himself. "The boy is a goner." Brainy said, taking his hat off and placing it over his heart. "Really Idiot?" Sassette asked, unimpressed. "Hey!" But the girl was already walking toward a cage like bridge that was over the taxi. Eventually everyone joined her and they were able to jump on the now moving yellow vehical. "Oh, my hip!" Papa exclaimed as Nat and Slouchy helped him up. "Come back here! Smur-" Gargamel (Who suddenly appeared from nowhere) didn't get to finish as the cab stopped and he slammed into it, head on.

"Ha! See ya Garbage Smell!" Sassette yelled with a laugh as the cab started up again and drove away. Soon they were deeper in the city, admiring all the colorful buildings, people in costumes (For some odd reason) Eventually, they noticed people staring at them. "Quick! Think of something!" Smurfette said. "Oh! How about camoflauge!" He and Smurfette stepped back and covered their eyes with their hands. "Blend in!" Sassette smacked her forehead in annoyance at the two's stupidity while the others either sweat dropped or rolled their eyes. Turning around, Sassette gave the watching humans 'the finger' though most still just whispered how cute she was.

Eventually the cab stopped and the man got out, taking the boxes and Clumsy with him, walking into a building with a giant tree in front. "Race ya! First one to find the window wins!" Sassette said, climbing up the tree and on to the branches close to the window, the rest following. Eventually she yelled down to them that she won and sat as the rest caught up to her. Just in time to see the man walking into another room. "Great, now how to get in?" Everyone else looked at Sassette. Even though Papa didn't like it, she was an expert at picking locks and getting into places she wasn't supposed to as well as devising plans the others couldn't.

(inside)

Unknown to the others, Clumsy had somehow gotten out of his box and was now exploring the apartment nervously. Until his back bumped something wet and solid. Slowly, he turned his head and came face to face with the owner's beagle. He blinked once. Then twice. Then screamed and high tailed it to the bathroom with the dog hot on his heels before he slammed the door in the dog's face.

(Back with the others)

"Did you guys hear someone scream?" Sassette asked as she slipped her knife into the band on her thigh and under her dress. Everyone else shook their heads and she shrugged. "Must be my imagination... I hope..." She whispered to herself as she slipped through the window which was propped up by a stick that was then kicked from it's place causing the gravity to take control of the window. Luckily Gutsy and Grouchy caught it, sending the smurf teen dirty looks that were easily brushed off. "Wow..." Brainy whispered as the group explored the room with their eyes before they set sights on the boxes from earlier. "C'mon!" Brainy exclaimed as he, Smurfette, Papa, Gutsy and Grouchy climbed on one of the boxes and the smurflings on the other. At the same time they flung the lids open, only to see... Office supplies and magazines? "Wait! Where the hell is he?!" The red head almost yelled "Bet they ate him." Grouchy muttered. They heard footsteps and quickly jumped in their respective boxes before shutting them tight. Unfortunately for all of them, the footsteps were heading over to them! The teens stumbled as their box was picked up suddenly and moved around. The four looked up in time to see a human male's face. They blinked. And then they all screamed, joined by the other's in the other box and two more from down the hall. The man didn't have enough time to comprehend what was happening and was extremely startled when the girl leapt at him, knocking him on his back before leaping towards the living room. The three other blues in the box ran after her but the blonde one stopped below his chin before yelling "This is for Clumsy!" And kicking him.

When the man finally got up and ran to the entry to the living room, he saw at least 9 blue figures running amuck. Quickly he grabbed an umbrella and started smacking everywhere, unfortunately missing every time. Then the one in the kilt started jumping on him and he started smacking at him before he noticed the red head from before was on his head. Stupidly, he fell for her trick and smacked himself in the head while she jumped off and ran down the hall with seven others while the one in the kilt started to hog tie him. Finally he decided to yell a warning to his pregnant wife. "Grace! Be careful! There are little blue monsters running around! Do not be fooled by their cuteness!" He was relieved when Grace answered back and she sounded okay. "Patrick, it's okay-" She cut herself off when she saw her husband hog tied with the kilt wearer on his back. He noticed she had the other's surrounding her and another was being held by her. She looked down at them before looking at him with a sheepish smile. "They're friendly." She defended lightly.

"Your lucky your lassy stepped in for you. I was about to bring out your guts and grind them into hagus." Gutsy said, making his hands go into claw position.

Patrick hit his head on the floor with a groan.

'Why me?!'


End file.
